A Circle Or A Cell? Letting Go Of Negative & Toxic Relationships
Wellness Wednesday On The Blog!
Welcome back to Wellness Wednesday! Today we’re talking about toxic relationships. You know….that on again off again ex, those one sided friendships, that relationship that you just know is leading to nowhere. Let. Them. Go. It’s the end of 2019 and the best time to re-evaluate your life and do a hard reset on some of these toxic relationships.
Toxic Relationship #1- The non-committer
You are a person who knows what she wants. You are dominating your work life, you have a good circle of friends, but your love life…sucks. Maybe it’s the guy that you just can’t shake out of your system and you just keep going back. We’ve all been there. But if you want to grow and be open to the kind of love you’ve been looking for, you have to let him go. That toxic relationship is going to keep you stuck in that I can’t find good love rut. I know, it’s so much easier said than done. But you have to make room emotionally for that real one who’s going to be right for you. Real love dosen’t take you on emotional roller coaster. If he’s not ready, you’ll be waiting a really long time.
Toxic Relationship #2- The Plateau
Ok, so you have that guy who been with for like ever. No ring. No babies. Maybe you live together. But you’re staganat and you want more. This relationship is toxic because your needs are not being fulfilled and it’s causing you pain inside. This may be hard, but ladies, you have to be stern about this one. If he isn’t going to level up with you then you have to let him know that you plan to move on. He will either take action or let you go. It may hurt but if doesn’t seem fazed by that conversation then you have to wonder how much you really mean to him. Your happiness matters. And there is someone out there who will cherish you and want everything you want. But if you’re tied up with this guy, you’ll never find the right one.
Toxic Relationship #3- One Sided Friendships
You’re the one your friends count on for advice, for a listening ear even at midnight, to borrow a few dollars, or to paint the town red on the weekends. But when you need them, crickets. Stop bending over backwards for friends who won’t do the same for you. You have and event, they have an excuse. You call them at midnight, they’re busy with their new man. You have a good time when you are together, but is it a mutually satisfying friendship where you both call/text to check on each other? Or do you get a call when they want something? Is the only time you speak when you call them? Is the conversation all about them and when you start talking about you- they have to go? Think about it. Friendships, just like any other relationship, have to be nurtured. In a true friendship, both parties feel like the other genuinely cares about them and their well being. When it becomes one sided, it’s toxic especially for the one always giving.
Toxic Relationship #4- The Coworker Conundrum
The workplace mixes you with people that you otherwise would probably never talk to. Or the complete opposite! Sometimes you find your BFF at work. But the later is rare. These coworker friendships can quickly become toxic and it ruins your work life. The best thing to do at work is to be friendly with everyone and to not take sides. Cut down gossiping and stick to the work at hand. When a coworker-friend relationship sours, you know where this is going…let them go. You still have to work with them so be cordial. Enemies at work can make your life miserable and may even drive some into depression. You spend too many hours there for it not to affect you. Make it a point to create a healthy balance of professionalism and friendliness. My tip here…kill them with kindness, even when you’re not on best terms.
2020- The Game Changer
Make the new year a game changer for you. You have no idea how much your relationships and the people you keep around you affect your mood, your attitude, and your overall outlook on life. If you are filled with negative people always complaining and using you, you won’t be happy yourself. But if you recognize and make room for more positivity, your whole aura will change. Happy attracts happy. And misery loves company. Cut the chains of toxicity off, and move into 2020 ready to take your blessings, girl.
Kayla
You are right, having a positive workplace environment is key in order to be productive and happy. We often underestimate just how much time is spent at work. I love the tips that you provided. I will be implementing the “Kill them with Kindness” in my everyday life.
Vanessa
Exactly! It’s fool proof. Can’t go wrong by always being nice at work.
Kelley G.
Thank you so much for your clarity on this! I’m so excited to be a GameChanger now, into 2020, and beyond! 🙂
Vanessa
Yes, making the change together! Moving forward with nothing but positive vibes only!!!
Amber
Whew you spoke a word! I had to cut so many one-sided friendships and now I feel so much lighter! Thank you for this!
Vanessa
You’re welcome! I had to come to terms with this myself. I know how you feel!
Amal
One-sided friendships are the worst. Always being the listener but whenever it’s your turn to be listened to, suddenly everyone’s not paying attention/unbothered. I cut off relationships like this without thinking twice!
Vanessa
I know exactly what you mean! It’s not a good feeling. But you recognize it and move on from it. Bravo!
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